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I speak C so the machine feels loved. "Segmentation fault (core dumped) — |
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🇮🇳 Based in India. I write C until the machine begs for mercy. I optimize systems until the profiler runs out of things to blame. I debug at 3 AM without StackOverflow — not by choice, but because that's what the segfault demands.
| Badge | Language | Relationship Status |
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C | 💀 Till death do us part |
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Assembly | 🫡 Respect, not love |
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C++ | 🤝 We talk at parties |
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Python | 🐍 For when I feel lazy |
My contributions being devoured by a snake (the snake is a memory leak)
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- 🔨 Building: A lock‑free, wait‑free, cache‑oblivious, zero‑copy thing that will probably segfault on first run
- 📖 Learning: How to outsmart the compiler — and my past self
- ⚡ Solving: Real‑world latency problems, one cache line at a time
- 🔍 Obsessing over: CPU branch prediction, false sharing, and why
volatileis a lie - ☕ Fuel: Mass amounts of caffeine + undefined behavior
- 🧠 "My code runs on the first try… in an alternate dimension."
- 💀 "Segmentation fault (core dumped) — also my autobiography."
- 🏎️ "I once optimized a loop so hard it finished before I ran it."
- 🐛 "I treat memory leaks like pets. I name them. I miss them when Valgrind kills them."
- 📡 "Career goal: replace myself with a shell script. Almost there."
- 🔥 "When I'm not optimizing: crying over a missing semicolon in C."
- 🧩 "There are only two hard problems in CS: cache invalidation, naming things, and off‑by‑one errors."
Made with ❤️, ☕, and a healthy fear of undefined behavior.
⭐ Star this repo if you've ever cried over a missing semicolon in C.
If you made it this far — malloc(sizeof(cookie)) 🍪 — you've earned it.